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26 posts from June 2016

Courage or Conformity?

Social pressure is one of the evil inclination's prime steamrollers, flattening most people in its path, both secular and observant. What doe sit take to stand up to massive peer pressure?

We're back this evening with our emuna shiur and live broadcast from Jerusalem, entitled, "Courage or Conformity"  which is a lesson that shows us how we are liable to lose our own special uniqueness if we don't exercise caution and the right judgment. This shiur is a must for all of us, considering the social climate we all must contend with today. G-d willing, it will take place in the ground-floor main sanctuary of the Chut Shel Chessed Yeshiva on 13 Shmuel Hanavi Street in Jerusalem at 7PM Israel time (12 noon EDT), is open to the public - both men and women are invited. You can see today's lesson here - the broadcast, as well as our lessons posted from now on - are Mac and iPod compatible. If you tune in too early to the live broadcast link, you'll be sent to the main page of the Breslev Israel website, so try to tune in on time.  If you are not able to view today's broadcast live, then G-d willing, you'll be able to see the video tape of it later this coming week on Lazer Beams. 


Today's emuna lesson is a powerhouse.

Don't think that your native abilities or lack of them limit you in any way. As we learn in today's lesson, entitled "Reach", the winners are not the ones who are the best or most talented, but the ones who reach the highest. In short, today's lesson is a lesson about believing in yourself - don't pass it up... And by the way, there's a big surprise at minute 40:00 in the shiur. Enjoy!

A Magical Mikva

Jherin's Mikva

Image, above: the brand new Jherin Esther Mikva (women's side) in Deal, NJ.

Here is great news for women in the USA who don't have children:

All mikvas are special, but this one is magical:

The brand new Jherin Esther Gorcey Mikva is now open in Deal, New Jersey. It's unbelievably gorgeous.

Woman from all over the USA are coming there and seeing miracles. Jherin, of blessed memory, brought so many souls closer to Hashem in her 16 tender years on earth. Now that she's free from bodily limitations, she continues to do wonders for people.

Recently, when I was in Deal visiting Jherin's parents Dr. Steve and Rachel Gorcey, may Hashem bless them, I had the privilege of immersing in the men's mikva there - no words can describe what I felt. When I came out of the mikva, I said to Rachel Gorcey, "I'll bet women will see miracles after immersing in this mikva.

Rachel responded, "They already are!"

It's worth the trip to New Jersey. If you'd like to make an appointment to immerse in the Jherin Esther Gorcey mikva, please call 732-222-1278. May Hashem bless you soon with the joy of parenthood, amen!

Protecting Tender Souls

Parental verbal abuse
That can't be possibly what you want: but why did you verbally slaughter your child for asking you a question while you were text-messaging? What crime did the little one do but interrupting your online chat? You certainly don't want to damage your child's soul...

It's really painful to see how parents destroy their children with verbal abuse. In this week's brand new issue of Breslev Israel web magazine, I write about the five main causes of this tragic phenomenon. Verbally-Abusive Parents is a must-read for anyone who wants to raise successful and emotionally-healthy children.

This week's Torah portion is Shelach Lecha, which talks all about the most unfortunate sin of the spies, shows why the spies botched their mission. Could we still be repeating their mistake today? Be sure to see Our Emuna vs. Their Emuna - it's an eye-opener. 

My beloved teacher Rav Shalom Arush writes that having a setback shows a person how terribly he needs Hashem every moment of the day. As such, the setback is intrinsically good, for it brings a person closer to emuna. For a shot of encouragement, check out Little Sin, Big Sin. That's not all - we have a double dose of spiritual vitamins from Rav Shalom this week. He says that the evil inclination won't fight you if you're "frum", especially if you do the mitzvoth as if they're a load on your back, devoid of all joy; whatever you do, read Appreciating the Gift.

Don't be fooled. My esteemed colleague and wonderful friend Dr. Zev Ballen warns that according to the rich motivational entrepreneurs on the web, people are poor because they're not buying enough of their motivational DVDs. The ggod news is that they don't design our lives; see more in From Pretending to Mastery.

Just because Racheli Reckles is writing about curves this week, don't think that she's doesn't tell things straight. She tells women, "There is nothing wrong with feeling confident about yourself. That's great; but, don’t confuse it with feeling the need to broadcast your anatomical curves to the world..." Gulp... Do not pass up on reading Classy Women. Don't think that Racheli's keyboard has stopped sending up smoke for the week. You must see Hulka Mama...

How can we avoid the self-defeating behavior of a bad habit or of repeated mistakes? How can we put the brakes on a downward spiral and make a new beginning? You'll find your answers in Dennis Rosen's From Troubles to Triumphs.

So many people begin relationships by waiting for the fireworks, and they want a soundtrack to go with it. They want their relationship to resemble a Hollywood movie, but that certainly isn't the real world or the good world, as we learn in Natalie Kovan's Cheesy Love.

Just today, a person who needs a major salvation wrote me a letter offering me any sum I'd ask to write him an appropriate amulet. I told him to save his money, for there's no guarantee that amulets work. But, as Rav Shalom Arush says, nothing so invokes Divine compassion as a Donation to Emuna Outreach. The dividends are phenomenal, in this world and in the next.

Blessings for a lovely new week!

What to do about an Overweight Wife

Overweight wife
Dear Rabbi Lazer,

My wife is way overweight. Whenever she gets pressured by anything, she grabs chocolate rugalach (croissants - LB) to console herself. I've tried everything to get her to diet, but if she loses two pounds in one week, she'll gain back four the next. What do I do? I'm trying my best not to look at other women, but with my wife more and more turning me off, it's getting harder. By the way, I really appreciate all your health and exercise advice - it's really helping me. With appreciation and hoping to hear from you, Meir

Shalom, Meir!

  1. The first thing that you must know is that a husband's prayers for a wife are very powerful. In your daily personal prayers (which I hope you're doing), invest 5 minutes of prayer for her in your own words. Ask Hashem to uplift her self-esteem and ask Hashem to help you give her the love and attention that she needs, so that she won't have to find solace in sweets, which are none other than chocolate-covered poison for the body.
  2. Buy her a gift of a new pair of walking shoes and take walks together; start for short durations and work it up to an hour, at least three times a week. If you have small children, it's worth it to pay a babysitter during this hour. You can't imagine what it will do for your health and relationship.
  3. Diet never helps. You must influence her to change her thinking and lifestyle, but this should be done as a couple. Cakes, cookies, ice-cream and other sweets as well as soft-drinks and other sugary manufactured foods should be considered as if they're not kosher, just like keeping pork in your home, for these substances destroy health. Together, go on an eating regiment (lifestyle, not diet!) that is based on foodstuffs that are unadulterated by manufacturers. Get all white sugar, corn syrup solids and modified starches out of your life - that includes cereals, cakes, cookies and most manufactured foods. Compensate with the best fruits, veggies, fish, meat and poultry, and cheeses. Once you lower carbs, you can enjoy nuts and seeds without worrying about gaining weight.
  4. Meir, intrinsically, a wife wants her husband to love her more than anything. Make the first move and give her that love, and I promise that she'll bend over backwards to please you. Meanwhile, offer her an incentive of a nice chuck of money to buy new clothes every time she drops a size or two. This is much better than paying doctor bills and it's also a mitzvah from the Torah to clothe your wife (ksut).

Start with the above four steps and keep me posted. I pray for your success and her good health. Blessings always, LB

Parshat B'Haalotcha (Nosso outside of Israel):

This week's mini-lesson is designed to cover both Torah portions, B'haalotcha in Israel and Nosso outside of Israel. Aaron the High Priest didn't participate with the tribal presidents in the inauguration of the Holy Tabernacle. He was jealous of them! How does Hashem react and how does He encourage Aaron? This is a message for all of us and a good "vort" to tell the family at the Shabbat table. Enjoy, and have a wonderful Shabbat!