Shavua Tov! I hope your Shabbat was great. Let's start the week off with a pop quiz. Doesn't that make you feel all nostalgic for school? Don't you just miss those dreaded days? So here goes:
In the past month, I have lost my:
a) house keys
c) brand new earrings that I didn't even get to wear yet
d) a large blue bag filled with all kinds of nice plastic table wares, such as plates, cutlery, napkins, etc. for Shabbat
e) all of the above
Now, if you may recall, if you don't know the answer, you're supposed to pick "c" for reasons beyond my limited understanding. But if you picked "c" in this case, sorry! You failed! The actual answer is "e!"
Yesiree. I really don't know what is going on with me. Why do I keep losing things?? It's so frustrating to not be able to remember where I put anything. Since I can't stand taking responsibility for anything (just ask my husband,) the real reason that things keep getting lost is because there is a secret black hole vortex somewhere in my house. I suspect that it's in the washing machine.
Actually, I just came up with an even better possible answer. I think my husband is messin' wit' my mind. I think he hid everything at his office, just so he can see how frustrated I can get. Yes. This is definitely the reason. He's getting back at me for all those years I threw his stuff away without asking his permission. Most recently, he accused me of donating his Sukkot siddur to a local gemach, (a place where people can buy used stuff fo' cheap.) Of course I have no recollection of doing such a thing.
One of these days I have to get over to the bank to check my account. I'm not in such a huge rush, because it's not like someone's gonna steal my millions. G-d willing, one day soon - like tomorrow - all of these things will just reappear. Until then, I have to accept all of these losses as a kapparah, a spiritual atonement for some transgressions that (fill in the blank) did. Like I said, I can't take responsibility for anything. Even typing that word hurts my fingers.
We should never think of our losses as random. Hashem has His own personal ledger, and He is keeping close track of what we owe and, well, what we owe. Because we really don't deserve anything. I'll share a little secret to happiness with you: consider whatever you get as a free gift, and whatever was taken from you wasn't really yours anyways.
It's all for the best! At least, that's what I'm going to tell hubby as I steal some cash from his wallet to get me another pair of earrings. And while I'm shopping, I might as well look at updating my wardrobe too, no?
Have a wonderful week!