Just look at this disgusting picture.
How delicious does that disgusting double burger with all the toppings and fries look??
After Shabbat David and I managed to get my tired and his lazy behind(s?) out of the house! Miracles! We went to the new mall in Bet Shemesh, which is the closest thing to America that we got. It's got at least 7 restaurants, a bowling alley, a supermarket, and an overpriced toy store. I gotta say that it's a very nice mall, and all of the restaurants have beautiful outside seating available.
Anyhow, our date was terrible. I mean, we didn't fight or anything. But I had to sit there and watch him enjoy slopping up this juicy, medium rare American style burger with a real bun and real fries. These are not things to be taken for granted in Israel. They're actual novelties.
I could have eaten just the hamburgers by themselves, but that would have been no fun. And besides, I hate eating late at night. Then my stomach stays bloated throughout the next day and I can't stand it. I hate doing Zumba on a bloated stomach. It's so unladylike.
Now I've been on plenty of bad dates in my life, and most of them happened to be with my husband, but this date takes the cake. In one word, it was gehinnom. After watching him take two bites, I turned around to face the other direction and ignored him until he was done. What? You think I should have been happy for him? What's wrong with you??
So I'm writing this post for two reasons. First, to throw David under the bus, which you know I love to do. And second, to tell you about my latest article that you must read. MUST!!
My article gives men a clear understanding of what is expected of them in a marriage, and clearly shows them how they may be making their wives' lives gehinnom even without realizing it. It's going to make me super popular with the ladies and super unpopular with the mens. Yeah, I said mens. You got a problem with that?
Nonetheless, GUYS, IF YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR SHALOM BAYIT, READ MY ARTICLE!
Oh, and don't miss my weekly post of insanity below! I'm sharing the latest developments in my fascinating and glamorous life!