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Tuesday, 07 November 2017


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Oh racheli, what a handsome husband!


Wasssuppp Nasty!!???
Hey I know that face , and I’m not referring to Dabids, you two wacks must be on the same wavelength as us (Barbi as u u refer to her)
And I , as we also went on a date,first time in Don’t know how long, last night to this new fancy M E A T restaurant here in the Kosher food Mecca of the world -Brooklyn.
And ordered the 22oz Prime rib on the bone covered in Shalot onions and other roasted veggies smothered in its own delicious juices...... while Barb got a salad .
But let me get back to the point , it’s not the greasy smile on David’s face u should be focusing on, it’s the gleam in his eye that u missed , look at the picture again. I know because it was the same look in my eye last night. You see although my soul brother and I thouroghly enjoyed our carnivorous food freenzy it’s the look in our eyes we have for our partners who join us for a intimate quiet night out , that you as women should be demanding that we do with you (in a steak house preferably) at least once a week! You see how Happy you make us!!! So I’m glad that I cleared that up for you and warm regards from Babs-


Is the bun Hamotzei or Mezonot?

Once in a while a burger such as that can help weight loss by speeding up the metabolism.


Londonmale, you are CORRECT! The bun is hamotzi, and that is David's once a week cheat meal! He's doing it for the exact reason you said! I also do a cheat meal, and I'd love to have it at the same time as he's enjoying his, but I just can't seem to resist the challah and desserts I keep making on Shabbat. It's so annoying! Maybe this week I'll be able to control myself... Thanks so much for your comment!


Judylicious, u'z on crack. That ain't no gleam in his eye. They're tears of joy for being able to eat such a gluttonous piece of dead carcass! YUMMY! BTW, I also eat very high fat, but this is David's once a week cheat meal, and I already had mine on Shabbat. So I couldn't eat it. Gotta preserve my girlish figure. Apparently you both are trying to preserve your girlish figures as well, Fred Flintstone. When are you guys coming back to visit us?? Better yet, when are you flying me in BY MYSELF??!!!! I'M READY!!




Thanks Racheli


This is from a WOMAN believe it or not:

Come on, how can you give such selfish advice - unless you were joking, of course? Speaking of your Garden of Gehinnom. How about a little empathy for what men go through: do you think they have it easy? Stop focusing on your navel, and start trying to understand him for a change.


DS, if you're referring to the actual article, ALL of my advice is based right out of Rav Arush's book. Tell him that his advice is selfish. And then go and tell those women who are suffering with the type of men I wrote about that their poor husbands don't have it easy. I'm not talking about good husbands, obviously! And if you had my navel, you'd focus on it too! lol


Your discussion about your husband is lashon hara and violates the Rambam's instructions of mutual respect between husband and wife. Your article takes the attitude that women have no responsibilities, which contradicts the Mishna and halacha. Garden of Peace is for men to read, while women should read Women's Wisdom. To do the opposite is a recipe for disaster. Your attitude on focusing on how bad your husband is and how disgusted you are by him is disturbing.


Y, obviously you are new to the Beams. Welcome! You should know that my humor is VERY sarcastic and dry. Plus, I build on one post after another so you'll have to scroll back a few weeks to understand why I wrote the whole disgusting thing. Those that follow my posts understand I'm not insulting my husband in any way. I'm a regular person and I don't preach from a holier-than-thou pedestal. And one more thing- either you never read The Garden of Peace, or you completely forgot what it says. If you have read it, you would know that Rav Arush places the entire blame of problems in a marriage on the men. My article is like Cliff's Notes for the book. Maybe I should have renamed it "Marriage for Dummies." Love that title! I've got to use it. And I IN NO WAY focused on how bad or disgusting my husband is! I was focusing on the BURGER, for G-d's sake!! But you wouldn't know that because you haven't been following my posts. I'll forgive you, but just this once. Chill out and work on cultivating your sense of humor, okay?? It's all good! Now go and read my other posts. Unless you never want to read my stuff again, which is okay too. I won't be offended. And I did read women's wisdom. In fact, I was one of the editors. And I DIDN'T read the garden of peace. But I've been around long enough to know what it says!


"Rav Arush places the entire blame of problems in a marriage on the men. My article is like Cliff's Notes for the book"

Rachel: Is this what you really believe? That women are never at fault for marital problems? Do you honestly think that this true?


I find it disturbing (to say the least) that anyone would lay total fault 100% of the time on the husband. This attitude seems to emanate from an incorrect perception. Sure I get it, if a hubby cheats on his wife he is a "pig" but the wife who strays is doing do for "emotional" support. Sure. Tell that to my buddy who walked from work early in on his wife "all tied up" and enjoying herself being quite "abused". What about the Avrech who told me his wife's friend has a side kick...another Avrech because hubby can't satisfy her. Really, this attitude that women are all tzadikot is hogwosh. At my ein yaakov shiur we just learned how Rav Elazars son was so in demand by women he was so attractive the women paid him for his "services". (Rebbe spoke to him and he returned to the Yeshiva, he did Teshuva). There are many other examples of womens' drives causing behavior that is not exactly proper. My point is, you cannot always blame men. It's a cop out. It's absurd to claim all problems are caused by the husband all the time.


Mister, get a grip! I'm not blaming ALL husbands! But each husband has a duty to take a good look at himself, because most men aren't prince charming! And who's saying no blame goes to the wife? But I'm writing a specific article here, not a novel. You need to read the garden of peace. Rav Arush himself puts the blame on the husband! Everything I wrote is straight out of his teachings. You need to also stop making connections that aren't there! Did I ONCE say that EVERY HUSBAND IS ALWAYS AT FAULT?? Go back and read my intro. I said "How they MAY BE making their wives' lives Gehinnom." Please stop seeing things that aren't there.


Dear Racheli,
You are contradicting yourself. You say you aren't blaming the husband all the time yet you cite to Rav Arush as support since "he says it's true".
So what is your opinion? Is it true that as Rav Arush says, it's hubby's fault (which clearly absolves the woman since fault is attributable to the man) or is it more nuanced and complex as I believe. I'm no Rav but I am entitled to respectfully disagree and I cite the numerous instances in the Gemorah (I've only mentioned a fraction I do not usually note this when I'm in shiur) where women had drives too and engaged in some extra curricular activities. Again, do you agree with Rav Arush or is it not so simple? It's a husband's fault all the time per Rav Rush. I'd love to hear your thoughts.


You have a valid question, Mister. I don't know why he puts all of the blame only on the husbands. I certainly don't, but that's my personal stance. I can tell you two things: First, I think he's intentionally making all husbands feel responsible because it's a man's tikkun to get married, not a woman's. Therefore, men should know what is expected of them and if something goes wrong, GENERALLY SPEAKING the man should do some introspection to see what, if any, behavior is provoking his wife's reaction. However, he will certainly judge things on an individual basis, and many times it will definitely be because the wife is a wicked witch, and no matter what the husband does it won't change her. But, he's writing a book for the masses and therefore has to make sure that everyone tries to hold themselves to the same standard. Second, he puts TONS of blame on the women is his women's book! Go figure. Again, I think it's because there has to be a standard that people can look to and do their best to reach. His language is harsh, but he's Moroccan. What can you do. And I'm Iraqi, so that's just as bad. It's like fire + fire = inferno. There are plenty of other shalom bayit books, but from what I've heard, none has saved more marriages than this one. So try not to get too stuck on the generalization. Just do your best to be a great husband and don't worry about his delivery. I hope that helps clarify!


For an Iraqit your English is superb. Thanks for your outlook. I hear what you are saying and what Rav Arush apparently believes.
I endeavor not to rely upon 3rd parties however great they are as IMHO only the Torah offers the Ultimate Truth.
Of course great leaders can help in interpretation but the Shekel stops at the individual.
No individual however great is infallible.
Even the Gemorah opines that money can corrupt the holy.
BTW I always understood that it was the tunisia-morrokai combo that was combustible. Common denominator, morrokai...Must be those morrokaim...


Mister, you should be even more impressed with my English because I'm actually half animal. Just ask David. I can bare my teeth as good as any predator - take your pick. I totally get that you're hesitant to rely on interpretation. Believe me, I also get confused because how can two giants in Torah interpret things in completely opposite ways sometimes? I think if you just stick with the general advice to work on being a great husband, you don't need to get caught up in his opinion that it's all the husband's fault. I'll hold by my personal opinion that it's only 99% the husband's fault. ;)))
And Moroccans are a dangerous breed. They bite. Sounds like you know one or two... lol

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